We all know we need to be prepared if we’re going to Australia.  

Brisbane has spiders the size of dinner plates. One, perched a foot above our heads, woke us by scratching at the wall.  

It was not pleasant, but at least the large ones are mostly harmless.  

It’s the small spiders that will kill you. And the snakes. And the rival gangs that firebomb each other’s illicit tobacco and illicit vape retail outlets. Australia forgot that prohibitionist approaches have predictable consequences.  

But there’s one risk none of us would have thought about. Or at least I’d never considered it.  

New South Wales police have spent the past few months investigating psychics. One has been charged with fraud. The police believe a syndicate of purported psychics has been operating in Sydney since 2006, bilking people of their savings.  

Police have seized tarot cards and a crystal ball. One person who was charged was refused bail.  

Psychics are too dangerous to roam free on the streets awaiting trial, unlike some of those accused of firebombing shops. 

Australia is a remarkable place.  

Really, they’re leading the way in extending consumer protection.  

The BBQ grill scrubber I bought this weekend claimed to be the best in the world. My son, tasked with scrubbing the grill, declared it inferior to our old worn-out brush.  

But the claim on the packaging is not actionable – nobody reasonably expects that there was any actual contest to decide which scrubber is best. The lawyers call it ‘puffery’. You can’t sue based on it. 

New Zealand’s Commerce Commission recently brought criminal charges against a telecom company promising 100% coverage.  

One might have thought that the claim at most warranted civil action by those allegedly harmed.  

Or that it was mere puffery, like claims from Tourism New Zealand that the country is 100% Pure. Or claims from Labour that they’d build 100,000 houses. Or claims from National that they’d get core crown spending down to 30% of GDP. Or claims from a psychic that they can commune with spirits.  

I think we should lean into this and start bringing criminal charges against government agencies and politicians who make similarly misleading claims. 
 
There’s a lot of work to be done if we really want consumer and voter protection to be more than mere puffery. 

Perhaps the guilty could be made to double-bunk with Australian spiders.